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How to know if a Thai girl is into you

I guess you could say that this article relates to not just Thai girls but most girls in general however Thai girls have a unique way of knowing that they are into you. Almost always it's never spoken either, Thai people have a hard time being up front about anything and less you ask directly and even then you might not get the right answer, either way you'll never hear someone say no unless it's over the internet.

Knowing if a Thai girl is into you is easier if you go out on a first date alone with a thai girl. Once your on the date depending on the type of girl she is she may touch you a lot, either on the hand shoulder or otherwise, if you find your Thai girl touching you when you talk chances are she is into you.

If your on a date with a Thai girl and you want to know if she is into you try simply holding her hand, again it depends on the type of girl she is but if she holds your hand back your in dude.Holding hands in Thailand used to be pretty much taboo 15 years ago but these days it's even more common actually last night I saw a girl with her thai boyfriend on the back of a motorbike holding her towel. Pretty obvious that she was going to go sleep at his place right! Times are changing.

If you still arn't sure do what I always do and be honest, ask her straight out if she is into you and wants a relationship (no matter how you want that relationship to be), in most cases you've cornered her and you'll get a straight answer. If the answer is in a very round about way NO then just get it, she's not that into you!

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24 Responses to How to know if a Thai girl is into you

  1. Matt July 11, 2012 at 12:28 am #

    hey chris, mate you are the guru when it comes to thai chicks. ok, here’s my dilemma. was in phuket recently, bout a month ago and met a cute thai bar girl. she is 24, me 36. yeh i know prob all wrong but have done my nuts ova this chick. we hooked up twice, she was an awesome fuck, don’t know what it is about thai chicks, but they seem to be bred to fuck lol. best root, top chick. anyways, my wife and i have recently split up, not as a result of this, and my feelings for this thai girl are very strong. we were talking to each other almost everyday on the phone since i got back to oz, me footing the phone bill of course. she has been crying on the phone telling me how much she misses me etc, and i miss her too but still am sceptical about it all especially from what i have read and talked to other blokes about. she mentioned about her family being poor, and she has got a 6yr old boy, that ok i got a 5 yr old girl, and she hasn’t been harping on about the poor aspect. i’m going back in 4 months, to have some fun and maybe, prob most definately hook up with her. i just don’t want her to be fucking with my heart, i am still dealing with separation etc, and don’t want this chick messing with my feelings. i know she is a bar chick, apparently she is new to the patong scene, she not at bangla but at a chilled out bar further down the beach. i think she is not lying about being new as she can’t speak good english. she sent me photos, and she now on facebook, and ive seen some photos of her being reasonably close to a tourist. i prob shouldnt get jealous cause it will eat me alive, and she will obviously be meeting lots of men working in the bar. i guess i would like your experienced input on all of this, whether to just let her go and see what happens when i go back, or work at keeping the relationship going. what do ya think? over the last week the phone calls have been minimal, so i dont know if she over me, or i was just caught up in the whole romance of the holiday so to speak. prob didnt help, but i said i cannot support her family if we were to be together, and she actually upset at the fact that i thought she wanted my money and nothing else. she really seems to have feelings for me, i made her cry when i said this, so i’m really fucked up as to what to do. any help or advice would be greatly appreciated. i really dig this chick. thanks mate.

    • Chris July 11, 2012 at 8:49 am #

      new girls to the scene can fall in love with guys this is normal for all kinds of girls but by the time you get back 4 years in the bar is like 4 years in real life! Be realistic mate this girl is pimping herself out do you even know the reasons why? She may have genuine feelings for you but in the end you need to figure out what it is you can actually do in this situation, she is here and you are there, doesn’t sound like you could be here all time time so in the end she will find someone else unless of course you can come here permanently in which case if you can’t you need to try to not let your heart on your sleeves and just keep her there as a really good fling. It’s hard sometimes when you meet a girl and it can’t work out only because of location but that’s just how it is. If you can move to Thailand permanently then it’s a different story and really a different answer to your question.

    • paul July 26, 2015 at 11:13 am #


      Your story sounds like mine. Im now 39 and my girl 27. I say my girl in the loosest of terms. Every time I have give her trust she has broken it. And lies?? Mate that is thai culture. Mia noi, Mia yay, gik and butterfly are all thai words that are well entrenched. Small wife, big wife and mistress. I live here but fuck this country and fuck thai people. 10 years coming here. I used to box here. more than one year living here and suffering. The more expats I meet with more experience than me just re tell horror stories similar to mine and similar to what sounds like yours soon. Read this word for word because this guy has the experience, understands the culture and speaks the lingo. Take head my friend.

      • Chris July 28, 2015 at 1:26 pm #

        Tell you something Paul, I’ve met 1000’s of westerners from all sorts of backgrounds and races in Thailand, many I used to call friends, most though I now don’t. I now have only a handful of friends, some I would rely on more than others but anything can happen to find those relationships fail as well. My point here is that everyone is a cunt, if they are Thai or otherwise makes no difference. The ‘Horror’ stories you talk about I’ve heard the same, mostly from imbalanced guys who believed that money can buy them love and friendship. When people don’t recognize when people are genuine or not it’s really their own fault, you quoting some dick from sitckmans site is a joke too, nothing but bitter twisted cunts on there, I removed the link, yes I speak Thai understand the culture and oh, my step mom’s been married 20 years to my dad with Aussie citizenship and worth more money than the majority of Aussies. I would say to people who don’t know shit (like yourself) if you really want to make it with a Thai girl and you are in fact an idiot, then marry a virgin, if she ain’t a virgin then your chances of her cheating you go up 1000%.

  2. jdm December 23, 2012 at 2:59 am #

    Hello young fellows, and hello to you Chris, very nice blog you have. Will recomend it to friends.

    My dilemma is:
    I met a thai middle age woman that have high enough income so i do not worry that she will be with me for my money. We have long conversations with her both side ask and answer questions, talk for life etc and we do that for a period. She says several times that she thinks that I’m a very nice guy. I learn form my experince that if woman qualify me as a nice that mean I’m in a friend zone, so no play there. My last hope is that thai woman is more conservative so they do not use more strong words. So is there probability she is into me or I just find a friend? What your opinion?

    Best regard, JD

    • Chris December 28, 2012 at 11:05 am #

      Just be careful, just because she has money or a decent job that you can’t still get fucked over. Not saying anything bad about this woman just saying i’ve seen it happen before, keep your wits about you you’ll be fine.
      My opinion is you have to be much more accertive tell her how you feel then ask how she feels. Be a man, some Thai girls are too shy to let you know physically how they feel about you.


    • paul July 26, 2015 at 11:16 am #


      You and others should forget this thai girl have good income shite. I was with a girl that had her own business. For a long time I used her as a shinning example that not all thai girls are the same. And loved to brag that my girl owned 3 hair salons, car land and property.. But, I was fucked over by her all the same.

  3. maximus January 24, 2013 at 1:20 pm #

    If you want to get into a serious relationship with a rookie bar girl you have to pull her out of this environment immediately! If you can´t offer her a proper financial situation when you are home and she in Thailand, or take her with you home I don´t think it´s possible to build a good relationship.

    I´m going to find a GF in Thailand, and if I have to support her financially when I´m not there I need to be 100% sure that she don´t screw me for money, time and feelings. Therefore I´m in contact with south-east Asia´s largest investigation company (Zele Investigaton) who use one week to find out everything about her past and situation/behavior when I´m not in Thailand (if she´s married/cheat/how use my money/still work in bar/other boyfriends/how long time being a bar girl, etc,). It cost´s about 500-600 €. And it´s worth avery single euro!

    I mean, if I have a GF home in Norway I have to support her financially too if she don´t work and make her own money, so what is the difference? Girls cost money wherever you are in the world, so why judge the sweet thai girls only? I can´t understand you guys in this matter, really! If you don´t have money to go into a relationship (because she´s not able to make her own bcs of the thai society or job situation wherever in the world) then don´t! You haven´t afford to it! Don´t expect she can give you the financial freedom western girls can. Get an education an get a well payed job!
    Using poor thai girls bcs YOU are poor home too is so disgusting! Then you are not a shit better then those girls who screw westerns! You screw them exactly as them, just in a different way! Get down from your ivory tower, you ain´t better bcs you only have the power bcs you are form the rich part of the world (and you are the poor one there).

  4. ian November 22, 2013 at 2:30 pm #

    hi iv recently been on holiday in pattaya i met a nice girl when i was there and spent 4days with her iv been back home in england over a month now an we speck on the phone 2 or 3 times a day an speck on skype everyday for an hour or so . shes 24 and has 2 children she says she split from the childrens farther cause he treared her badly . shes never asked me for money and she allways says im her only love . im going back to see her in april an she wants to take me to meet her mother farther and children . she recently had an accident on a motor bike and shes in hospital but she hasnt asked or said anythink about money she sent me a photo of her in hospital an spoke to me on skype an showed me her arm in a bandige . can you give me any advise if shes a good girl .

    • Chris November 23, 2013 at 1:30 am #

      You met her in a bar in Pattaya….What do you think common sense says?

    • Buttercup November 23, 2013 at 11:22 am #

      The odds that she is a “good girl” versus she’s going to wreck your life are not worth considering given what’s at stake (your life)

  5. Studentstuff May 20, 2014 at 12:07 pm #

    hey chris, I just recently found this site and think its really cool you reply to comments asking for help.
    So I wana peg on that vibe if its not too much trouble.
    Im a south african indian student in china, and my now ex is thai, from nakhon ratchasima, we’ve both been here for more than 2 years and last year we met and after about 2 months of hanging out we started dating. I have a lot of experience with women, but this is/was my first time with a thai girl. I guess i can leave out the details, but my question is how do i know that she is actually into me. some of her friends tell me she’s still inlove with me, but she insists she doesn’t want a relationship right now (we broke up in november last year). I guess I do really love her, but the thing is she’s extremely shy, incredibly stubborn and unused to showing affection. I got a decent amount of affection out of her while we were dating, but even that was only when we were alone. I don’t think i am farang, and shes never said that to me. Also she has a thing for ‘tomboys’ here,she insists she just likes to hang out with them and nothing close to a real relationship ever happened. Dude im so confused, any sort of response will be greatly appreciated. What is my next best move?

    • Chris May 20, 2014 at 4:04 pm #

      Your next best move? My experience has been when a Thai girl says anything but i love you and want to marry you, then you can safely assume she ain’t that into you. Also any chick that hangs out with tomboys on a regular basis is someone i wouldn’t go near. Bottom line if she doesn’t want a relationship now, then don’t have one. If that’s what you’re looking for then look for someone else.

      • paul October 1, 2014 at 2:45 pm #

        Hi Chris. Can u please expand on your tomboy comment. I have girl and she calls her friends her gang. 2 or 3 tomboys as she calls them (or lesbians?). One keeps telling my girl she is a tomboy….she isn’t but she mentions it like its a good thing. Why are tomboys bad news?

        • Chris October 1, 2014 at 7:09 pm #

          Yeah dude, if I were you I’d tell her to stop hanging with these tomboys or leave and if she doesn’t i’d leave anyway because it’s more than likely they be trying to get her away from you, they cunning little bitches moreso than regular girls. Concider them butch lesbians, they hate men, and if you asked them if they hate men directly of course they will deny it same as a racist would.

  6. INeedAnswers September 4, 2014 at 11:16 pm #

    Hey chris. I’ve met a thai girl here in Aus. The thing is she is going back to thailand and the first time she came here I never told her how I felt. Now she is back again for half a year and I’ve confessed my feelings for her and asked out but I haven’t got a yes and I haven’t got a no. I haven’t tried holding her hand like your article suggested. What do you think I should do? She is studying here and said we could spend time together before she goes back home so should Keep trying or just give up. Courting a girl for nearly a year seems like hard work just to spend a few weeks with her not that I wouldn’t consider flying to thailand to spend some time with her

    • Chris September 5, 2014 at 10:12 am #

      Mate sounds like your in LOVE! lol The fact that she’s in Australia studying suggests to me that she’s on her parents dime and they would be very strict about NOT having a boyfriend which I suspect is your real problem. Is she a virgin waiting for marriage? Cause otherwise 1 year is a long time though I dated a Thai girl for 1 year before I even got a kiss but that was 16 years ago. Really wish I could help you more but it’s hard to know what some anonymous girl is thinking. Good Luck.

      • INeedAnswers September 9, 2014 at 9:51 pm #

        I forgot to mention the part where I work for her sister which is how I met her in the first place if chasing her was a problem surely I wouldn’t still be working there lol. As for her being a virgin idk I haven’t asked her yet. I’ve dated a thai girl before and when comparing the two they are different. The first one I went out with well she rarely talked to me when I first met her from a friend and talked on fb. I had to break the ice lol with this one i can be myself around her. she’s staying in aus for 7months. Thanks mate I might need it.

  7. stu October 13, 2014 at 11:16 am #

    Hi Chris I’ve a wee problem you might help with? I’m in pattaya on holiday and surprise surprise I fall into the trap head first, I have a 20 year old bar girl and she is very lovely of course I have paid her bar fines and her nightly rate 1000 baht for a few nights bought her clothes and she hasn’t asked for anything, however as you say it’s all about the money and there is no doubt she be away with the first man for short time although she tells me no, problem is attachment I like the girl she showed me pictures of her sister and farang boyfriend, any advise???

    • Chris October 13, 2014 at 11:55 am #

      As soon as you pay a bar fine you are entering into a prostitution. You may like her, she may even like you but don’t forget this is all about money. No doubt you’ve liked other girls before as well right? If you found this one you can no doubt find another one. The best thing about prostitutes is there are more out there. I know you think you like her but this is just a vacation, think about the future where she isn’t in it and just have fun for the moment, don’t whatever you do start promising to send money back blah blah blah that’s her ultimate goal. Good luck, and forget love with hookers, the only love there is for money.

  8. stu October 13, 2014 at 1:13 pm #

    As a new comer to the whole experience I find it hard to accept the way of things so I really appreciate all/any advice I would say this trip has been eye opening and hasn’t gone entirely smooth. Naive and stupid spring to mind I’ve read alot of your blogs and they are extremely informative any advice on how to continue and enjoy this trip fully?

    • eddie November 17, 2014 at 4:41 am #

      hi criss in march 2014 i went to pattaya for the first time in my life,met a cambodia girl the first night,just started talking to her on beach rd,she later came back to my hotel,she was ok but i felt as if i wasnt really conecting with her,the next day in the evening she took me to soi diana,and we had a drink in 1 of the bars,the girl who served us i could tell strate away that she liked me,i said i was hot and in a flash she pulled out a cold wipe from the freezer and started to wipe me down,she was always try to make conversation with me and i liked the attention,i was thinking to myself mmmm i like this girl,she wasnt like the cambodia girl who was all tarted up and wearing hi heels,this girl was very plan looking no make up and no hi heels,more your plan jane look which is more my cup of tea,but she was beautiful,i didnt want to ditch the cambodia girl there and then,so i took her back to my hotel for 1 more night knowing i was going to change ladies,this bar girl is thai by the way,before i left the bar she said come back,and i said i will,the next night i went back to soi diana,and she was there,i asked her to have a drink with me and wow did we hit it off,didnt need to play any games to bond,infact within 20 -30 minutes we were kissing,i paid her bar fine and she came with me,i dont no what it is but i felt something for this girl,i could to see what a shit life shes had and been treated very badly by other men,as im seen to be a sweety with woman or thats what they tell me,im quite very chilled out guy,easy going and like to make people laugh,we were having a great time she had a shity phone so i brought her a new one,after about 2-3days being with her she told me that she loved me,and you no what i think i was falling for her also,oh also when i paid her bar fine there was no other talk about money,she never gave me a flat rate,she just went with me.ended up staying 12days with her,she down loaded line on my phone so she could talk to me when i was back home which is the uk,for 5 months she rang me every day saying how much she missed me and that she did not want to be with anyone eles apart from me,in those 5 months she pretty much told me everything about her which i find very hard to deal with sometimes,septembar i went back to spend 2 weeks with her she met me at bangkok airport and we got a taxi to pattaya,in the time i was with her she would not stop kissing me and telling me that im the man of her dreams,shes 28 by the way and im 41,im italian but born in the uk,slim and i like my cloths to look good,i dont have a problem getting chicks in the uk,but i love thai woman,and thats why i went to thailand in the first place,weve had a few arguments on the phone because i find it hard to deal with her past,but she goes back to her village when i go home,and i no thats true because i talk to her on skype every day and i can see shes

      at the village,she tells me that she wants to be with me for the rest of her life,i said that i cant move to thailand because i have i big morgage here i need to pay that,ive tested her so many times and she getting fed up of it,i think this girl really loves me so im thinking of bringing her to the uk,she has 2 children who live with the father scotish farang who lives in chon bury,i say what about your children she says they will be ok,i just want to be with you,i have sent her money but small amonts she wants it so she can pay for her internet so she can talk to me everyday,the thing is,is i would like to have some more ladies,shes says if i go with another lady its over,and im afraid that i wont conect with other girls the way ive conected with her,also the fact that she properly slept with hundreds of men,how can i compere to all the other men shes been with,im going back in febuary to spend time with her,but i have demonds in my head,but im telling you this girl gets down on her knees saying im the man shes been looking for all her life,please give me the best advice on what you think i should do.if this girl really loves me should i bring her to the uk as my parther,i would like some more girls but i think i mite not get the same reaction that i get from this one,what should i do criss.

      • Chris November 20, 2014 at 10:53 am #

        So let me get this straight. You never been to Pattaya before, but when you came you met a bar girl, fell in love, you’re now sending her money, and now you’re travelling back to Thailand to see her in the hopes you can take her and her kids back to England. Check with reality dude, In the end it sounded like you don’t think you’ll find another girl that smiles at you the way she does? Stop talking to her spend another 2 weeks in Pattaya and you’ll find another one just like her. Once you’ve been through a dozen of these girls this is when you’re idea of sending her back to England is a waste of you’re time and money. Probably just lonely in England I can get that bro but don’t fuck up you’re life with some bar girl. Save the money so you can move out here instead and get 20 of these chicks without having to buy a bloody plane ticket. I do hope you listen to me.

  9. Mike March 28, 2016 at 6:22 pm #

    Hi Chris. I have a bit of a unique one.

    I was in bkk last November. Been there a few times so I consider myself wiser about bar girl culture etc. i met a girl at Soi cowboy (wait for it – I’d usually not give it a second thought) at one of the bars that hires coyote girls and I’m pretty sure she was a Coyote girl. i don’t bar fine girls as its not my thing but I thought I’d test her and ask. She said 3000 but she said no boom boom only dinner etc. (obviously I didn’t pay 3000 as that’s ridiculous). I think she told me to come back at 2am one time but I couldnt understand her and I was drunk too. Maybe drink less you say. I think she was asking me to come at 2 to bypass bar fine and go for drink afterwards.

    I went back a couple of times spent time with her bough her a couple of drinks each time and she never wanted me to leave kissed me most of time. I know she was working for drinks. I went off to Phuket and came back a week later and swung by on way to airport and spent a couple of hours with her. Same deal. All over me. Asked about bar fine again as a test and she said no boom boom. Can not. Only dinner etc. She gave me her number so I took it. She had offered it to me the second time I was there from the previous week but I didn’t have my phone and didn’t think about getting her number cause I though she was just a bar girl.

    It wasn’t until I got back home that I thought she may be a coyote girl which means not prostitute so I messaged her. She replied. Started slowly because she couldn’t afford txts so she suggested whatsapp and we have been talking on it ever since and I have developed feeling.

    Now to set the scene, I’m doing pretty well in life mid 30s. Good looking. Well dressed. Smart enough to not let my feeling run wild until I’m sure. She’s smoking hot mid 20s seems like a good girl. She says her Aunty needs to know everything about her. Where she goes etc. I tested her again about bar fine and boom boom and she again said cannot. She tells me she cares about me. I have her heart etc. she sends me miss u messages, photos. She has not asked me for money or anything. She only asked for me to come back to bkk.

    Now my take is to control my feelings. I only really spent a few nights with her and haven’t had sex with her. I think she could be a virgin although who knows. She was working on cowboy. Now my experience with coyote girls is limited so hope you can shed more light. My take is they are young hot girls working for drinks.

    I put another test out to her and pretended one time that maybe we should not talk again and she seemed to get upset saying, I’m dying here cause you no like me. Maybe that was a bit cruel.

    I asked her if she wanted to stay with me when I came back and she said she will think and ask her Aunty. She also said guys only want sex at which point I suggested I had feeling (not that I don’t want to have sex but I’m not after a hooker). She tells me she cares about me. I did probe her for her feelings as I found Thais don’t divulge easily.

    usually I’d just go back and see but I need an outside view for this one as I’ve developed feeling. I don’t like wasting my time on girls who aren’t worth it. What do you think??

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