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Pattaya Nightclub Reviews Pt. 1

Pattaya has a good amount of discos that are open late and they all seem to offer something different. Only Bangkok can compete with the options Pattaya gives you, but Pattaya has to be the best in Thailand for after hour’s clubs. I will give an honest assessment of each in a two part article; check back early next week for Pt. 2.

Insomnia - In the middle of walking street, Insomnia has a little bit of everything going for itself. Downstairs is actually more like a large bar. The music is loud, but not quite as loud if you can sit all the way in the back, overlooking the ocean. Downstairs gets started pretty early and it’s usually packed by 11PM. There are lots of girls to talk to; some people seem to think that the hottest freelancing women in Thailand choose Insomnia as their nightly spot. There is no dance floor downstairs and there are multiple bars so I’ve never found it difficult to get a drink.

Upstairs is a dance club and there’s no point in going there until Midnight or later. It’s open very late especially on weekends. I can’t even tell you what time it actually closes because I’ve never been up late enough to experience it closing on a Friday or Saturday; but certainly past 4AM and probably more like 6AM. You can get a VIP table upstairs; but this seems kind of silly. The girls are in the middle of the dance floor. If you have a girl with you for the night there are better places to go to. Of the many times I’ve been there I have never seen it without talent. There are always at least a few cute girls there. I have actually mistaken some non-bar girls for bar girls (how could I possibly have done that???) upstairs. Downstairs this wouldn’t happen, and upstairs I still think 90%+ of the girls there are working, but there’s usually at least a couple who aren’t. There are a couple paid dancers upstairs who are purely just there to dance, but I wouldn’t go as far as to say they’re impossible to talk to.

The music is as loud in the upstairs club as anywhere in Pattaya, and it’s non-stop electronic music. The prices are high; as high as anywhere really. But you kind of get that money back by now having to pay for any bar fines. The club gets crowded but it’s always easy enough to score a drink thanks to 3 full sized bars.

The place to go if: You are making it a late night and you want a good looking freelancer. If you are looking for a weekend companion this also might be a good place to start your search. Those that actually like electronic music may rate Insomnia as having the best dj’s and music in town, while those that can’t stand the stuff will be repulsed until they are too drunk to care.

Lima Lima - Opening a little over a year ago, Lima Lima did well for itself with a furious marketing campaign plugging some headline DJ acts they brought into town. This went a long way to getting the place a good reputation which it still generally has. The club is under Mixx across from Bali Hai Pier. This is considered to be a great location since there is ample parking nearby and unlike Insomnia, you don’t have to make your way through half of Walking Street just to get there.

I don’t think there is a debate about which is the nicest disco in Pattaya, Lima Lima wins that distinction hands down. Being newer helps, but the owners put probably more into the design of the club than was necessary. The club is split into two rooms with two dj’s. One side also has live acts from time to time as well. You’ll see Russian hostesses and dancers; some of them are beautiful, but not necessarily easy to talk to, good eye candy none the less. There are some paid Thai dancers in the club as well and while they’re a little easier to talk to, it may still be an uphill battle. In terms of the freelancers that go to Lima Lima, I wouldn’t give them a high grade at all; a C- is fitting. However there are more non-working girls who go to this club than any others in town. I see European girls on vacation there, and I see groups of Thai’s (mix of guys/girls) who go there for a good time. IT’s really a very mixed crowd and it trends younger than most other clubs so that’s something to keep in mind.

The place to go if: You are with a girl who wants to go dancing or with a group of couples who wants to go out and not be absolutely bombarded by freelancers. Let’s put it this way: if an old girlfriend of mine came into town and demanded that I take her out to a night club in Pattaya, this would be the one I’d take her to.

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About ParadiseCity

M. Schwartz is an expert in all things Thailand. Having seen and done it all, there is nobody more equipped to teach about a successful ex-pat transition to Thailand. He wrote the cult classic guide book for men in Thailand called, How to Get the Most Bang for Your Buck in Thailand
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